STANDS4 LLC, 2023. Right now we're going to have a wedding, but directly after that we're going to have a funeral. I love ya too much to build you a dud! You're so beautiful, you take their breath away. Second question. While a miserable Eddie has to play checkers with Steve. I'm wearing a Bart Simpson's mug. I kept quiet last week and I haven't say anything tonight. I mean we've made contributions to this country for over 300 years, but you wouldn't know it looking at most history books, it's not fair. Finally, one rainy day, I walked in dripping wet, and that same man that pushed me out, shook his head and gave me a library card. Could you write that A down on a piece of paper? Carl: Overreact? https://www.quotes.net/movies/family_matters_102099, https://www.quotes.net/movies/family_matters_quotes_102099. Steve Urkel: You said, "Get a life, Steve", A week ago you would have said, "Get a life, TURBONERD". I'll teach that. Clean up your room Edward. The only reason I asked you to be my partner was because I was worried about my grade. Carl Otis Winslow: Calm down, Harriette, you're overreacting. Carl Otis Winslow: I recognized him right away. Not name your state. [Eddie groans as Carl walks in to brighten his mood], [Eddie leaves with Carl to hang out with him. Harriette Winslow: You hit my husband again and you'll have to answer to me. Waldo: I'm sorry, Steve. If you hit me, do I not sneeze? We'll start with a common Korean phrase. Everyone would think that Laura is in love with Steve Urkel and no one would vote for her. [Notices Maxine & Laura left the living room] Well, I thought it was a good story. [Eddie, Clarence and Steve are arrested by the police for theft.]. Steve Urkel Had Some COLD lines for Laura and we all aint peep it Follow N Subscribe https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCLt1bradMOW81OkAFlIZvfw/subscriberhttps. "Clean up your room, Edward." [after Steve's Urk-yeast exploded all over the room]. And I like the Red Sox. Judy Winslow: Who wants to read about cheese? You know, Harriette, It's the thought that counts. Rachel Crawford: Well at least we know where it is. You've been saying it for weeks. [puts his thumb as his mouth, baby voice] If I were five. Now you're going to find out what it's like to be Steve Urkel. Carl Otis Winslow: Look at it again, Harriette. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: [voiceover, as Johnny Danger] So there I was, staring death right in the face. Harriette Winslow: Laura, did somebody do something to you? Hmm, hmm, hmm, hmm, hmm, hmm, hmm. This is amazing! Myrtle Urkel: Oh, just two weeks. Steve Urkel: Is there anything I can do for you while I'm down here waiting? Waldo Faldo: Be careful he has another one. Eddie: [after he has heard her quickly renouncing her love for him] Myrtle, what's my life going to be like without you in it? I met Raoul. I'm Stefan sweet thing. Laura: Steve, you like this kind of music? I love my Army. Estelle 'Mother' Winslow: Oh that's sweet, what did he say? Harriette Winslow: Carl, I save every card you give me. Carl, Eddie: [after Carl gets shocked from the electrical current] STEVE! The next minute rump roast! [the oven explodes from the kitchen and Waldo emerges], Waldo Geraldo Faldo: I think we're gonna need a new stove and a floor to put it on. I'm starved. Carl Otis Winslow: Only 2 of them were his. Rachel Crawford: Well, I'm planning dinner for a very, very special friend. Harriette Winslow: What's the matter, not feeling well? Boyd broke my glasses. Rachel Crawford: Harriette, we've got to talk. Suppose I made it happen. [Urkelbot throws robber into a pile of soupcans]. Judy Winslow: Boring. Rachel Crawford: Well, Steve, I am your boss. We're getting dirty looks from old people! Laura Lee Winslow: O.k. Cassie Lynn: But, it's a lie! Carl Otis Winslow: Now honey, it's really ok Harriette Winslow: No it's not ok, Carl. That one friend who says going to gym will solve everything. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: [after Steve, Eddie & Waldo sang 'My Girl'] Don't we remind you of The Temptations? I love you more than life itself. Carl: [in an Urkel like voice and gives Stefan some money] Here takes some casher rooney and fix it sooney. Kanye West name-dropped "Family Matters" star Steve Urkel on his My Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy track, "Dark Fantasy." However, Ye originally thought a similar line rapped by T-Pain was "corny," the "Buy U A Drank" singer claims.. As reported by HipHopDX on Tuesday (Sept. 7), T-Pain says Ye stole the concept for the Urkel-referencing line after hearing a similar lyric on his . Mango? Get me a cherry slurpy! Steve Urkel: Oh, no buts! I think I'm gonna have to fire Waldo, Steve. Steve Urkel: I have a lot of personal experience in first aid. Laura Lee Winslow: I know, but he said 'get lost, Laura'. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: [to Carl] Worse. Steve Urkel. Carl Otis Winslow: Two stalks of broccoli and three pieces of asparagus? I can see my dad! And you taught Cassie Lynn Nubbles, the posterchild for useless people, how to do things for herself. Shen I suggested it, her lovely eyes were momentarily clouded with nausea. Cassie Lynn: Look, Becky Sue. Edward 'Eddie' James Arthur Winslow: [nervous laughter] Great Wedding, huh dad. Stop the music! [Steve has just fallen off the tree and onto the Coopers' pet Doberman, Damien. Carl Otis Winslow: No. Edward 'Eddie' James Arthur Winslow: How could you mess this up? He's never used his! Laura: We're not going anywhere until the ground rules are straight. Steve Urkel: Hey, you gotta get up if want to get dow oh [guests scream as Steve falls off the edge of the roof]. Stefan Urkelle: Well, it could be a few days, or weeks, or [Steve voice] any minute now! Carl Otis Winslow: [fishing for the catch of a party Eddie wants to go to] Are his parents going to be there? Harriette Winslow: And it would be nice if you would support me sometimes instead of hiding behind your napkin and caring what the other people think. In fact, do you know what it is Harriet? Steve Urkel: Laura? Laura Lee Winslow: Rachel Crawfish, you got me, and I like the St. Louis Cardinals. Harriette Winslow: [Takes an envelope from Carl] 'Lose Weight, Feel Great at Chicago's Premiere Health Spa, Hip Whippers'. Sign up | Log in An . Rise! Steven Quincy "Steve" Urkel: [Unstraps his gloves] Sir, not only have you harrassed and insulted me, but you have sullied the reputation of my lady love. Why, you might as well drop a boulder on my foot, shove bamboo shoots under my fingernails, or scoop my eyeballs out with a melon baler. Mont gio sam eea!". Look, Steve. Laura: [Curtis is about to break bad news to Laura] Curtis! Chocum hi chip chok!". Steve Urkel: Carl, I brought the notes to go over with Laura. Steve Urkel: I've invented nuclear batteries. I just spend two hours talking a guy off a ledge, then found out he was a window washer. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: What's your aunt's name, who'd want to kill her, and who do you like in the World Series? Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: I call Waldo Faldo up. Me and Laura went ice skating together. From 1989 to 1998 (via IMDb ), White . I'm drawn to you. Steve Urkel: The woman's been flirting with me. [does Steve's laugh and snort]. And, my God, look what you've done to Waldo. How about the next round we switch colors? My parents would only take Steve if Steve's parents promised to take me. Waldo Geraldo Faldo: Wow. Wha? But Waldo messed up and put the wrong date on the flyers. Steve Urkel: Hi Harriette, hi Laura, hi Harriette, hi Laura, hi Harriette, oh look, it's Laura! Estelle 'Mother' Winslow: [to Carl] I know you're stubborn as a mule but you don't have to act like a jackass! I feel stupid! Laura: By being born first. Steve Urkel: Of course. Eddie: I'm sorry, Steve. Steve Urkel: All right, Laura, we'll randeavou at the Isetta. Edward 'Eddie' James Arthur Winslow: [Stands up] Dad, I'm not implying. Five hundred on the line. Harriette Winslow: Every time she stops, she starts all over again. Waldo: [Monotone while Steve mouths his words with him] Pablo was a kind and gentle creature. [Turns and squirts filling on Carl's shirt]. Steve Urkel: Well, look at his poor, pathetic face. Steve Urkel: [Hanging on a ledge] I've fallen and I can't get up! Carl: I can't tell him I don't remember him! 4 Mar. While he was starring in "Family Matters" as Steve Urkel, White also began a side hustle as another staple of the era's popular culture . It's like wanting to touch a star- you know you'll never reach it but you've just gotta keep trying. [reading] "Mongu! Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: This diary belongs to Harriette and I will not violate her privacy. Steve Urkel: Loving you is like trying to touch a star. Big guys have never played keep away with your hat on a cold day. Carl Otis Winslow: [pulls up a chair] Sit down, Edward. Rachel Crawford: Sort of an Urkel Exchange Program? Carl Otis Winslow: You know son, if Screwing Up ever became an Olympic event. Laura Lee Winslow: Most people don't know that. I'm in big trouble! 11 days ago. Carl: [after kicking Steve out of the house] And don't you ever come back! 2023. You refuse to go out with me for the last decade! Carl: AAAAAAHHHHHHH! Needless to say she's not amused as he jumps on there]. Harriette Winslow: Carl, you snuck into my card box and gave me a card that I already have. This semester we're Steven, you'd better get going. Harriette: Judy, finish your Brussels sprouts. Clarence has under control. Quotes.net. Waldo: Fifteen and that's as high as I'm going. Did you think of me while you guys were camping? Maxine Johnson: It happens every year the day of the prom. Steve Urkel was the breakout character for the hit Friday night ABC sitcom "Family Matters" while Jaleel White who played him was the show's breakout star. Waldo: Yeah, but I was so nervous when I asked her out that before she could answer, I barfed all over her shoes. And to top it all off you gave me an old card that I already have. Can you believe that? Carl: I don't have to take this, I'm going home! YOU'RE WHERE? Carl Otis Winslow: [after bringing Eddie home from jail] Now Edward, stop looking around for Steve. It meant a lot to me. Why, a few sessions on the Muscle Master and you'll be drooling over my deltoids. Besides it's just a joy ride what could go wrong? Now I know, I'm not worthy of you- but I love you more now then I did then- Laura Lee Winslow- will you marry me? Maxine Johnson: Was there a line to get your pictures taken when you guys walked in? Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: I almost wore that same suit. Steve Urkel: I can't! And what about the car show last Saturday? But I like myself, and that makes me cool. Wa chee! Estelle 'Mother' Winslow: How did she die? Steve who? I was just talking with your grandmother. Steve Urkel: [after discovering that the stereo in Eddie's car has had its serial number scratched off] Uh-uh. At a party, once, he clamped cables to his earlobes and jump-started a Volkswagen. Harriette Winslow: Carl, those are my personal and private thoughts. Judy Winslow: Um so Grandma are you gonna be a June bride? Carl: Uh-oh. [Waldo and Maxine are dancing to R&B music and professing their love for each other. Steve Urkel: Why, come back here, you little hussy! Can you imagine that? Waldo: Hey, you don't have to like my cookin', but, please, don't call me names! Rachel Crawford: I'll just take your word for it. Steven Quincy Urkel: Come on, yeast! But I have feelings, too. Estelle 'Mother' Winslow: L means lousy. Would you reward me with a kiss? Steve Urkel: Oh, I see. Sergeant Shishka: Urkel, Winslow, you are not on my list of new recruits. If you have something to say, just spit it out. Would you like that? Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: All right. Edward 'Eddie' James Arthur Winslow: Oh really, why wasn't I told? Steven Quincy "Steve" Urkel: [is chased and hides behind a jock] Hold me back, hold me back. Especially this one, since Urkel breaks the fourth wall at the end. Edward 'Eddie' James Arthur Winslow: Willie Makeit? Fortunately, when I was young I had no friends. Carl: You know, the only thing worse than not catching any fish is hearing you sing about it. Waldo: We rented us a limo station wagon. Eddie: As a starting forward of the school team, it's my duty to play round ball not nerd ball. Get down from there! He's fanning his hace with a plate as Eddie walks in]. And, he's got something that he didn't have before. Carl Otis Winslow: Steve, Everything was Going Just fine, until You Blabbed that I was a cop. I may get a B. Laura: Dad, this is serious. Willie Fuffner: [Grabs Steves gloves] Urkel, you are dead meat! [Stefan tries to stop the chamber and the chamber ends up being busted. Pick-up lines get a bad rap for being cheesy and cringe-worthy, but if you start your conversation with the right dose of interest and humor, you may end up scoring a date or a number. Edward 'Eddie' James Arthur Winslow: Hey Steve, Was'sup? Edward 'Eddie' James Arthur Winslow: Waldo! "Tomorrow, Dad!" Curtis Williams: I'm Curtis Williams. Steve Urkel: Ssssh, not while I'm pouring. I do not like 30 people hanging around my shoulder, saying "Hey Senora, can you eat a little faster?". Steven Quincy "Steve" Urkel: Fuffner, I've heard of some low things in my time, but forcing Laura to go to the dance with me is plain dispicable. [sees the kids] Oh my Lord! I'm going to give you an 'A'. Steve Urkel: Then your nasal passages swell and your nose and throat slam shut tighter than a clam. What is the value of X? Harriette Winslow: Carl, I'm up in Laura's room and she looks at me, and she asks 'Why, Mom? Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: [Waldo heads into the kitchen as Steve emerges] You o.k., Eddo? Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: Big Guy, what are you up? Urkelbot: [sneaks up behind the robber and surprises him] Freeze! Steve Urkel: L-long enough to get i-icicles on my nose hair Look! Easy Eddo. Steve Urkel: Oh, why not? Steve Urkel: Now, relax, Eddie. People stopped and starred, called me names, and some even spit at me. If all you ever look for is the float with Miss America on it, then the whole parade is going to pass you by. 5. Allison: Look, we're just having a little harmless fun. [laughs]. [Urkel is playing Danny Boy on his Swiss Melody Chimes and Carl is furiously awaken by it. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: The Snooze Juice. And I hear myself telling her the same things my mother told me. Waldo Geraldo Faldo: Where are we going, Willie? Rachel Crawford: Mother Winslow, guess what? [Waldo nods as Eddie goes to the next name]. Read the card, read the card. [Maxine laughs hysterically after she leaves the house]. Hey Steve, would you like a breast? "Smile, if you want to have sex with me." 4. OGD now knows the police aren't enemies]. Waldo: Laura, I know I'm just wasting my time, but would you like to kinda, maybe go out with me, sorta, tomorrow night, maybe? Harriette Winslow: Now let me get this straight. I've had more food than this stuck in between my teeth. Ms. Steuben: Uh, excuse us just a minute. The valet gave me a tip. Included in the potential "Did I Do That?" Carl: What? [removes Carl's napkin from his shirt and tosses it on the coffee table]. Harriette: That won't get the stains out. Steve Urkel: Yeah, but now I have an excuse. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: Rachel Crawfish? Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: Uh no, Waldo, state your name. Edward 'Eddie' James Arthur Winslow: How'd that happen? Steve Urkel: And I'm Steve Urkel! Steve Urkel: [Steve is suing Carl on the TV show Citizen's Court and Waldo has been called as a witness] Waldo, how did you feel about Pablo? Harriette Winslow: She says OGD's a great kid, but he hasn't had it easy in his life. [goes to the refrigerator] No root beer? Carl Otis Winslow: Edward, who are all these kids? Eddo. Eddie Winslow, front and center! The man was open all day! Carl Otis Winslow: Hey sweetheart, how about some pie? Carl Otis Winslow: Yep, Benjamin Banneker. You got the whole family off on the wrong foot. You're setting a bad example for the kids. You would win the gold. None of this is your fault. Empty the cash register! Steve Urkel: It wasn't that play that cost you the championship. Harriette, THERE IS A CAR IN THE LIVING ROOM! Why, because of you, he's swapping recipes with Wolfgang Puck. I'm being born! Laura: Steve, I can't talk now. [Faces Eddie] Look at him, charming, handsome, popular. Rachel Crawford: Yeah do you want to be buried or cremated? It better be a dead relative in your excuse. Let's just hope we can rub off on him before he rubs off on 3J. Edward 'Eddie' James Arthur Winslow: Listen, Melissa may not be a cover girl. Carl Otis Winslow: [kisses the ice cream carton] Goodbye. Laura and Judy, divide up the rest between Barbie doll fans and Lego lovers and get them upstairs too! We were just having a little fun. Cassie Lynn: That may be what happened, but that won't be what the people believe. Steve Urkel: What? Ordinarily, I like a table right next to the water. Steven Quincy Urkel: I'm not through! Upload. Alex Phillips: How 'bout you put your money where your mouth is. He's gonna drive us tonight. urkel-steve. aries: "You strike me as a woman who has never been satisfied. Laura: Science class. He woke me up too. And him. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: Well, what are you waiting for? Who does these things? I just caught her, that's all. Pass the salt, Edward. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: [Opens Diary] January 1, We had a wonderful New Years Eve party, except Carl got sick and threw up in the living room. And sometimes I was sorry I ever started the whole thing, but I didn't quit. I'm cooking breakfast. I never got an 'A' before. It's the closest I'll ever get to marrying you- thats why I wanted you to have this- no strings attached- just the one to my heart. He's usually knee deep in dead mosquitoes. Waldo Faldo from Illinois. Harriette Winslow: Carl, out first table was next to the entrance where everybody was waiting to be seated. Three times X equals six. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: Well, so is Urkelbot! Harriette Winslow: Why? Carl Otis Winslow: [Gasps] Why of all the low down Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: Calm down, Carl. Steve Urkel: No, but it was moving kinda fast. "Tomorrow Dad!". Her temperature shot up and she tossed more cookies than the Keebler elf. It's a "non-date". Someday, I'll thank myself for this. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: My uncle, Elijah Urkel, has been struck by lightning four times. CNN Actor Jaleel White is joining the growing list of celebrities who have launched a cannabis brand. [Willie is upset at Waldo as Laura shows up to the crime. I mean the guy's a feeb. White, known for playing Steve Urkel on the 1990s sitcom "Family Matters," is. My daughter's been hurt and I can't do a thing about it. Inside this scrawny chest, there beats a heart. He is portrayed by Jaleel White. Steven Quincy Urkel is a fictional character on the American ABC/CBS sitcom Family Matters, portrayed by Jaleel White. Ha ha! Steve Urkel: Why, to make everyone think that the woman I love actually loves me back? Larry Csonka: Yes, spread the word. Laura Lee Winslow: You're lucky, you got into a great fraternity and all it cost you was your best friend. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: Who would've thought Harriette was a bit friendly. Dr. Goodrich: Ms. Crawford, I am a medical doctor, not a carnival act! Due to the Urkel character's off-putting characteristics and the way he would stir up events and underscore the plot or even move . Weasel: Yeah chill. Harriette Winslow: Carl, calm down, it's not the school's fault. Rachel Crawford: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! Steve Urkel: King me. Steven Quincy Urkel: Oh, put a cork in it, Missy! I'd lay one on you that would weld your glasses to your face. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: [brings her in to meet the Winslows] Now don't worry, they don't bite, and even if they do they've had their shots. Edward 'Eddie' James Arthur Winslow: We took in $2,000 dad and we want you to have it. Let's keep this one! You are such a sweetheart. [faints]. Did you know an African American helped design the blueprint for Washington, D.C.? Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: Allison, is that true? No, you're not invited. Myra Monkhouse: No, I came to visit my Aunt Monica, she's the Reverend Mother here, now why on earth would I join a convent? [the photographer takes a snap shot of Eddie nerously laughing as Carl drives him away]. Harriette Winslow: [gives him a tray of drinks] Here, take these with you. Ms. Steuben: Steve, it's not a good sign when you have to give your bread a pep talk. Eddie: Oh no, I forgot all about the car show. Harriette: I guess it wouldn't hurt to take a home economics class. Harriette Winslow: [to Rachel] Believe me! Rachel Crawford: Right. "Will you marry me for just one night?" 7. Laura Lee Winslow: Now, for the championship and the toaster oven, who made the first patented shoe sewing machine? Carl: Oh, you heard me, don't ever come back. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: Oh they love the new me. It's late. Waldo: Man, they didn't even know who we were. A few minutes ago, I just saw Laura and I fanted. Steve Urkel: Because, I love you love you love you! Carl Otis Winslow: Steve, The real Psycho Twins would have still been in the ring wrestling, If It wasn't for Your stupid sleepy juice. [Carl steps in the chamber and Stefan starts it up]. Newsflash, Eddie! Carl Otis Winslow: Better, I locked him up. Carl Otis Winslow: 150 extra people on what should've been a small family affair. Pretty girl, dark hair your sister for God's sake! Stefan Urquelle. I wanna take it home and read it to my mom. Harriette Winslow: Carl I am not a weak, wimpy woman whose afraida to speak her mind. Cornelius Eugene Urkel aka OGD: Bye. Carl Otis Winslow: You know you were rude to that guy, Harriette. Steve Urkel: How tough am I? Maxine: Ugh, what is this? Carl Otis Winslow: I know. Raoul is the new produce manager. Rachel Crawford: When the paramedics got there, they thought SIXTY-SEVEN people had died! I may get F's, but, by God, I earn them! We are properly trained. Harriette Winslow: And I always mark the year, you gave it to me. Mucus comes in so many colors. Waldo Geraldo Faldo: But you humilate me everyday. Harriette Winslow: You can't blame them for walking, Eddie. I wouldn't know what to charge. Harriette: Yep, they were yelling at each other and bumping bellies. Now, I may have taken a sip of my mom's coffee, but I Chain: I'm talkin' about the other kind of wired! Then, you broke my car, and it cost me every cent I got to fix it and rent this "delightful" room here at the "Fleabag Inn". Steve Urkel: Well, what if you trip or something? I wanna read it to my mom. Now let me get this straight, you dented the car. Waldo: [after thinking a moment] Ok. He acts like a gangster, gangsters hate cops. Ms. Steuben: All right, class. So to see if he can find the best, Steve challenged a few men to put their usuals to the test!SUBSCRIBE to get t. Steve Urkel: Sh-she touched me, Carl! Harriette Winslow: For my birthday, you bought me an exercise trampoline. Estelle 'Mother' Winslow: Yeah, you have to use bleach. Steve could've been killed. Carl Otis Winslow: [after picking up Eddie who was arrested for gambling] Edward, stop looking around for Steve, he's at his own home having this same conversation with his parents. Carl: Maybe you can even resurrect your band. I wanna play some of my own records on the jukebox, but I don't know how to put them in. Your grandma is gonna fight for your right to party. I'll tell you something else, Allison, I may not be the most trendy guy on campus, or the best looking and I'm CERTAINLY not the most coordinated. You had an accident. Steve Urkel: Uh-oh, Mr.Frostbite. Edward 'Eddie' Winslow: That's what I said, but Dad still said no. Stefan Urkelle: Oh no, I didn't shut off the machine on time. Eddie, your father left you three messages for you and you never called him back. this is when Urkel was the funniest, when he was youngest, seasons 1 & 2. Curtis: I don't know how to tell you this, but I have to tell you straight out. Bushwhacker Luke: Me mother was arrested by cops last night! Harriette Winslow: Carl was nice enough to invite you into his game and you've been acting like a jackass.